Early Morning
7 am: What time is it? You can’t do anything until 8 or 8:30, S, so go back to sleep.
7:52 am: Request to cancel telehealth appointments, explain reasons for cancelling, try to resolve Astronomical Bill aka Bonafide Problem. The same Bonafide Problem we’ve worked on resolving for the past eight months that they swear is fixed but always isn’t. AB aka BP is the result of miscommunication and not processing insurance claims correctly, but this time it has messed up my accounts. And I’m ticked off.
8:00 am: I’m put on hold, transferred to another department, and transferred again, all while listening to what would otherwise be cool music if I weren’t so agitated.
Promises, more promises, and possible (God, I hope so) refund.
9:00 am: Borrow $XX.00 from stepdad for possible fees created by issue, find out I’m not the only one who has experienced this hot mess, and that The-Medical-Facility-That-Shall-Remain-Nameless is notorious for doing what they did. Thankfully, all overdrafts and fees are waivered (hooray).
9:52 am: Debate returning stepdad’s money since I didn’t use it. Glance at gas gauge. Ask myself, If the arrow is pointing precariously toward the little red icon, can I drive for, say, four more days before refilling? Self to self, And how has that worked for you before, S?
I keep $5, text stepdad, and return the rest to him.
10:20 am: On to the next hurdle. But I need a snack. So, I plop a bag of peanuts and a Pay Day candy bar onto a conveyor belt. They’re both $1.19, so I go with plain peanuts. Less sugar, perhaps? Maybe when I have my A1C check the doctor will thank me, or I’ll thank myself.
10:30 am: Question, what can I put with coleslaw? Chicken wings? M doesn’t eat chicken. Burgers? I can’t digest ground beef, and I can barely tolerate ground chuck. I look at the prices and have a slight panic attack. It’s honestly the wrong grocery store for buying meat, and the least horrifying packages are the packs of ground chuck, so burgers it is.
Conflict, do I use the $5 that I’m holding for gas, or do I dip into bill money? I contemplate riding on E but then adult reasoning kicks in.
11:00 am: “Seven dollars on pump four, please.” Self to self, This’ll barely get me home.
11:30 am: Stop at car insurance place. I’m due a retro credit, if that’s a word, for the multi-vehicle discount per month that I was promised August 2023 but haven’t gotten since…forever. “Has it been credited, and if so, what does that make the bill for this month?” I ask, all excited. The receptionist gives a figure, and I realize it is suspiciously close to what I already pay. So, I ask how much they’ve credited. “$2.22,” she says.
Of course, the person I spoke to initially isn’t in. Of course, the computers are down. Go figure.
Afternoon
11:45 am: My chest hurts which reminds me to call the cardio clinic. Ironically, I must cancel my next checkup because I can’t afford it. I relay my dilemma to the scheduler who asks if I want to reschedule. I don’t foresee having any more money later than I have now, so I tell her no, not yet. I request my medical records and leave a message for their heart monitor tech.
12:00 pm: Self to self, Six more days. Six more days of meals to figure out. What can we eat for six more days at, say, $4 a day that is heart-healthy, glucose appropriate, and inflammation-free. Think, S, think.
12:10 pm: Chest still hurts. I need a chill pill, but if it cost anything…welp.
12:15 pm: I get a text from Mom. She wants to know if I can go with her on an errand. I SO don’t feel like going anywhere with anyone today. So, I text Not today and tell her about the last few hours. Then I change my mind and agree to go with her on her errand.
12:20 pm: While waiting for mom I recalculate and try to come up with a sensible formula for the rest of the month.
PLAN A
XXX.00
XXX.00
XXX.00=_________________ BUT THEN HOW WILL WE EAT ???
PLAN B
XX.00
XX.00
XX.00=___________________ BUT THEN HOW WILL I PAY THE ELECTRIC BILL ????
PLAN C
X.00
X.00
X.00=______________________ I GIVE UP ???
12:40 pm: Nephrologist, reschedule. Chiro, reschedule. Rheumatologist? I need that one, asap. I’ve already gone too long, and my finger is all crooked and hasn’t worked right since September of last year. Ophthalmologist? Despite paying the balance down, another checkup will wreak havoc. But my eyes are swollen, and I’ve had no shortage of folks telling me that my eyes “look weird.” They’ve been weird for so long I can’t tell the difference, so I glance in a mirror. Something is definitely wrong. I snap a picture for proof just in case my eyes decide to behave on the day of my checkup.
1:00 pm: Mom toots her horn. I wave to let her know that I’ll be out in a minute. Mid-wave my stomach misbehaves.
No, S, no…
1:00-1:15 pm: Stomach turbulence
1:20 pm: (Mom) “You’re still going? We can stop by my house if you need to.” (Me, while gripping stomach) “Yes, I’m dressed now so I’m going. Let’s ride.”
1:30 pm: A small blessing (hooray, hooray, hooray)! Less calculating now and a little more leeway. Head to Dollar Store.
2:00 pm: Heart monitor tech returns my call. We discuss options. I ask if my loop recorder can just…come out of my chest or turn off or maybe send a remote scan less frequently (I get billed every time it sends a scan. Not the full cost but costly still. Every month.)
Tech says they could turn the remote part off and I could manually use my clicker whenever I have an episode. However, I’d then have to drive 30 miles to the clinic and have them read it there. That’s gas, driving, a clinic fee, and a reading fee. Plus, sometimes my heart stops for a bit while I’m asleep. So, how would I manually capture that if I’m…asleep? I ask the tech and there’s a long, awkward pause.
We both decide that I’m better off leaving things as they are, and the tech recommends I set up a payment arrangement.
2:30 pm: I call for a payment arrangement and I’m told that the current bill can only be split into 2 payments aka 2 months. I mentally divide.
Lord Ham’mercy.
2:45 pm: I call the hospital where I had my in-house sleep study and ask about payment arrangements. The billing clerk informs me that it’s “only $XXX.00” as if that’s chump change or four quarters, and no matter how many times I say I can’t pay the bill in one installment, even if it is “only $XXX.00, she repeats the same thing. So, I say thank you and hang up.
3:00 pm: Ditto. See above. Same thing, different place.
3:10 pm: I get a text from a friend asking if I can type up a resume. I don’t feel like thinking or mentally exercising my brain anymore today, but I ask her when she needs it. She says she needs it by Wednesday. I need the money, but I’m exhausted. Still, I agree to do it and we confirm for tomorrow.
Early Evening
4 pm: Someone washed their hair (my kids have hair down their backs), and now the tub is stopped up. We already have a plumbing prob (see earlier post on plumbing prob), and water has been sitting in the bathtub for two hours already. I pour Dollar Store generic Drano and pray it works its magic. I text Mom and ask if we can borrow her bathroom.
5:51 pm: The Dollar Store $1 Drano didn’t do anything, at all. No magic. Water is still sitting in the tub.
6:30 pm: Mail, bills, and mail. But also, another small victory, another hooray (yay, yay, yessss)!
And how was your day? 😊
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